Leggings vs. Tights

I am not normally a fan of leggings or footless tights, but perhaps we need to clear up what’s what here.

Footless Tights are actually just cropped out tights.

They usually end mid-calf, and should be worn under skirts, a dress or a long cardigan.

Think of them as tights, just with some..er..Peggy Bundy flair.

Leggings are not tights, and nor are they pants either!

For me, they are too skintight to be considered pants.

Leggings are thicker, usually going to at least ankle-length and ARE NOT PANTS.

(You would think it’s okay to wear them as pants right?

Wrong. They stretch.

And when they stretch, the fabric becomes transparent.

Do you see where I am going with this train of thought?)

I say that they are NOT pants because technically, pants can be worn with something that doesn’t feel the need to cover the crotch area.

If you NEED to cover the crotch area while wearing leggings, then they are not pants.

But if you commit this fashion sin and wear them LIKE pants and don’t cover the crotch area…

…..then you’re just trying to make me scratch my eyes out when I get an unwanted peek at your junk.

Don’t get me wrong.

I actually think leggings are very comfortable and cool.

I see their appeal.

Just cover your junk.

NO ONE wants to see that.

Now that we have that cleared up…

How do you pick the CORRECT size of leggings?

You have to be sure that your legs don’t look like black little sausages.

Go up a size. It’s just a number. Don’t get it all twisted in your head.

No one can see the size of the leggings plastered on your butt (or can they? ), but they can certainly see if they are too tight for you.

Read: not opaque enough, because they’re being stretched to their last fiber.

I don’t own leggings, but if I had to wear an XXXXXXL, I would.

What clothes do I wear with leggings?

Something that covers the crotch.

Skirts, Dresses, Long cardigans.

All hot.

I actually enjoy those looks when they’re done right.

This, is done fairly wrong for me. The tops and skirts need to be AT LEAST a couple of inches longer.

Rule of thumb: If you bend over to pick up a penny, and your top/skirt/tunic flips up, I can guarantee that if I am walking behind you, you will hear:

“GAAAH NO!! OH MY EYES.. MY EYES! WHY!?!?“

or in French:

“PUTAIN!! MES YEUX, MES YEUX!!! POURQUOI!?“

And this is the right way to do it:

What shoes do I wear with leggings?

Ballet flats.

Or tucked into knee-high boots.

Heels.

I’m seeing ankle boots (not my style, but may be yours), pumps, chunky heels, gladiators.

I’ve seen it all, and it looks kinda cute.

The sky is the limit.

(Just cover your junk.)